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Sillyness

High School Poetry : Heaven

The following poem? is something I wrote in high school. I came across it in an old notebook, and since I’m sleep deprived right now, I’m going to go ahead and post it online. I may regret this in the morning.

Heaven

The sharpness of the light was almost unbearable.
I took a moment to think.
To really think.

I hadn’t seen light like this in…
Forever.

Colors were flying, taking the pain away.
This was real, I was alive.
My stained world was slipping away, and with that
I saw depth. Miles and miles of depth that topped everything.
The cracks on the walkway made the most brilliant patterns.
The concrete which at one time was just that,
Concrete,
Was now a mosaic of life.
The individual rocks were gleaming, shouting out.
Noises weren’t noises, they were information, power, and love.
It was too much,
I couldn’t take it.
Sensory overload.

I think I passed out.


Then the dreams came.

All in full cinematic color,
Dreams of people,
People I know,
People I’ve known,
People all around.
I wasn’t worried though,
I wasn’t claustrophobic in these dreams.
It didn’t feel my breath being squeezed out of me like before.
Instead, I was taking in the smell of young girls perfumes,
The kind that drive a guy into a frenzy.
I was listening to the conversations of everyone,
All at once.
I was drinking the sweet wine that was in my hand.
My glass never losing a drop.
I was in Heaven.
The excitement of it,
Like going to your first high school dance or that first kiss.
It felt like the world was boiling in my head.
I knew everything and nothing all at once.
Full of feeling without feeling.
I tried to question myself.
My reason failed.
I didn’t want to know what was going on.
I didn’t care.
There were no answers to my questions.
They just stopped being questions.
Erased from my mind, replaced
With new senses.

Orgasmic.
I slowly looked down,
Almost in tears at the feelings bursting inside of me.
Was the girl of my dreams kneeling before me?
(I mean this was perfect, wasn’t it?)
Instead, I saw the marble floor;
Perfect.
There on my pants, a small wet spot.
I couldn’t believe it.
I laughed out loud,
Not embarrassed.

Originally published on Friday July 19, 2002 at 2:34 am

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