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Sillyness

One Moment

I don’t want to forget this.

Rush’s “Presto”, Orson Scott Card’s Xenocide, a rocking chair and tears. Tears of joy, tears of knowing, tears of fear that maybe this is real, this experience I’m having. I’m shaking even now. I’m tingling.

I’ve taken drugs that simulated this. They were nothing.

I’ve been an atheist for years. Sometimes I said it out loud, sometimes I held it in my mind. Now: I doubt it.

I’ve wanted to believe in something, anything. Having a soul or a spiritual self was inconcievable to me. I’m sure this doesn’t suprise some of you that know me. I’m also sure that this experience isn’t anything new to several of my fellow humans, but this was my first. After almost 27 years, this was my first, and in-between my tears right now I’m laughing. I’m laughing that my first thought was to share it with the world in the only way I know how. My weblog.

I just had what I can only describe as a spiritual experience. I hope I have more.

Originally published on Saturday October 18, 2003 at 10:47 am

[2] Comments

This experience can be very easily explained by a few simple factors.

You felt like you where a "former" everything at his lowest point. Rush is playing in the background. A "former" member of Rush is John Rutsey. The root of his last name is Rut, signifying that you have been in a rut lately. Also note that he was a drummer and you feel like your life was out of rhythm.

John Rutsey formed the band with a guy named Alex Lifeson. Alex Lifeson plays the guitar for Rush. A guitar can also be called an axe. The Summit Hut sells axes and you just got a job there. This means that you are worried about your new job. Alex's nickname is Snow Dog. Snow dogs are found in the northern hemisphere where there have been an increase of northern lights activity caused by an increase of magnetic partials ejected from the sun. These coronal mass ejections are caused when a huge bubble of gas is released into space from the sun. Fusion on the sun is caused mainly by helium. Helium can also be found in birthday balloons. Your birthday is only 11 days away. Which shows you are anxious about your upcoming birthday.

My advice is to flip over to some Pink Floyd or something unless it's "Dark Side of the Moon" then we'll have to start this thing all over again with a lunar spin on things. :-)

Ralph said this 13 years, 11 months ago §

you crack me up!~

Aaron said this 13 years, 11 months ago §

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